Counseling for Cancer (among other things)
Until I recently started tossing around the idea of seeing a counselor, I had no idea about the “stigma” that went with it. Sort of like when I got the tattoo on the left side of my belly and people told me AFTERWARDS how tender that spot is – that’s what this venture into counseling has felt like. I didn’t realize some of the perceptions that went along with it until I entered the world.
For the past several months I’d tossed around the idea of seeing a professional counselor. Life has it’s way of throwing curve balls, and they had just been adding up in my case. When they come one at a time, I can handle them. But when it feels like I’m at the batting cages and the machine that’s throwing pitch after pitch is broken, and they just keep coming one after the other, faster and faster — I knew it was time to get some help.
So, a great friend gave me a resource and I started meeting with a lady last week to help me work through some of life’s big issues that have come my way. And lucky for my readers and anyone else on the internet who googles counseling, cancer, or “do Twizzlers make your poop red?” — my most popular google search listing, I have decided to blog about it. Too many of us out there need help, but so many of us won’t go get it. It makes sense to go to the oncologist, radiologist and every other “ologist” we need for our bodies, but when it comes to our minds, we feel we can handle it. At least that was me until a few weeks ago when I finally broke down and signed up for some help.
Someone mentioned to me that when you go to counseling, something must be “really wrong,” and that’s why many people don’t want to go. I thought about that for a little bit and found it interesting. First, because just about everyone will say seeing a counselor is something good for you to do; and second, if trying to work through issues related to two bouts of cancer, infertility, family, jobs, relationships and an array of other things isn’t “really wrong” – I don’t know what is.
So, I started meeting with a counselor. And I’m really enjoying it so far. I’m one week in and have already learned a lot. I wouldn’t say anything is fixed, solved or that I’ve figured out my life, but at least I feel like I’m on the path to feeling more “me” again. I’m glad to have reached the point where I’m ready to conquer the emotional and mental side of this disease as well and stop running and hiding from all that scares or frightens me, even if it does come with the perception that something must be really wrong with me. Because let’s face it, sometimes living through colon cancer isn’t that much fun. But there are people out there to help us get hope again, and that’s exactly what I am set out to do.