Author Archive
Well, it’s March 25. Man where has the time gone?
While the time has been going – where I don’ t really know – what has NOT been going are my blog posts. It’s so hard to write sometimes, and especially as a writer. I wonder if people in other trades have the same problem. Do chefs go home and make dinner for the family? Does a painter make sure his house and all of his walls are crisp and fresh in paint? Probably not. Or at least, I’m going to choose not to think so in order to feel better.
Anyways, all of that to say sorry for not writing more. I’ve got about a million ideas swirling around in my head about what could-be blog posts. Not to mention there’s a new opportunity to write for a devotional book again. Oh – and I really want to write a book about my cancer-infertility-adoption story this year. But you know – yeah.
However, I was encouraged and challenged yesterday by a book that I’m reading right now. It’s my first “I’m a Mom Now” book – meaning it has “mom” in the title. A whole new experience for me that’s a whole new blog post – BUT – my point is that the book has challenged me. It’s challenged me because it recognized that as a mama of a young kiddo, life is BUSY. However, as busy as we are, we must make time to exercise our God-given gifts and talents for His glory. We have to make time for us, make time for Him, and make time to exercise our gifts.
I’ve been writing a lot for my freelance copywriting business lately, but not for my personal benefit – nor the enrichment of others. The book was great for me to read yesterday, as it’s given me a new challenge to get back in the game. It’s harder now than ever, but I have to make the time to write. I think it’s why I’m still here. And by golly, I am going to make the most of this.
March 25, 2011 at 7:04 pm
Today, I hope the world is covered in blue.
Not to show support of a team, or even a special school.
But to carry the message of colon cancer awareness.
While those of us impacted realize that wearing a certain color won’t make cancer go away,
We do know that it will help people realize the importance of colon screening.
And that it really is a big deal.
A colonoscopy is much easier to deal with than surgery, chemo and radiation.
That’s why those of us who have gone through it keep getting the message out.
So today, on Dress in Blue Day, we ask for your help.
Spread the message. Dress in Blue.
Encourage everyone (especially those over 50 and with a family history) to get their colons screened.
Let’s save some lives together.
March 4, 2011 at 7:31 am
What to do if your baby poops in the tub:
1. Stop, look at it, and come to the realization that yes, that is a big turd in your tub.
(step 2 is what I should have done, alas, I instead skipped to step 3)
2. Remove baby from tub immediately, and hang her/him over the toilet in case they’re not finished. If you don’t, you’ll end up having some really bad “poop water.” Yes, I speak from experience.
3. Recruit help (if someone else is around) to hold baby while you take care of mess in the tub. Try not to beat them up too much over their gag reflex.
4. Take a wipe and scrape the poo out of the tub, or collect it if it’s floating. A fish tank cleaner might even be helpful if this is a common occurrence. Grab one of those baggies from your diaper bag (like the ones you take with you when you walk your dog, except for kids), and put the dirty wipe and pieces of poop in that bag. Twist to hide the smell. Dispose.
5. Drain the poop water, clean the tub. Refil the tub.
6. Re-wash your kid who has just soaked, and possibly even splashed, poop water all around your bathroom. Make sure to get any toys, too – and keep them out of their mouth. Eww, right?
7. Re-bathe your baby, washing off the poop water from him/her.
8. Laugh and tell the kid they are awesome, because now you have the best rehearsal dinner story ever.
February 17, 2011 at 11:50 am
If you would have told me three weeks ago that I’d be putting our daughter to bed in her own room tonight, I’m not sure I would have believed you.
But that’s exactly what has just happened.
The phrase “God works in mysterious ways” just touches on the miracle that’s taken place in our lives over the past few weeks. We thought we had an idea of what our adoption journey would entail. God obviously had other plans. And we couldn’t be more delighted, excited and absolutely blessed.
Word of a precious, 4-month-old baby girl came to us three weeks ago. She needed some parents and a stable home. We were thrown for a bit; we had not signed activation papers with our agency yet and thought we’d be matched with a pregnant birth mom in another US state. We thought it would take a few months. Yet something about this baby girl intrigued us. She was older than a newborn. She was biracial. She was absolutely gorgeous. She was local. And something about this just felt so meant to be.
So a few weeks ago we started down a road that led to confirmation after confirmation that this indeed was the child that God had prepared for us. Everything worked out so smoothly, all of the what could-be complicated details were smoothed out. Doors and windows just seemed to fly open. And we agree with the many who have said, “it’s just a God thing,” as this adoption process has been very fast and nearly seamless.
So it was with great joy today that we were given temporary custody and got to bring home our little gal. Her adoption should be finalized in six months, via Missouri law. As her adoptive parents, we’ve chosen to give her the name of Mae Brooke. While the idea for her name originally stemmed from our love of music by one of “our bands,” the name has come to symbolize so much more. Mae because it’s the month we married, and it means new beginnings and family for us. Brooke because we dearly love both of our siblings, and we wanted to carry on their names with our kid(s). I pray that she can always look up to her aunt, Laura Brooke, and love and know God through the example she sets.
We are still in awe and pinching ourselves just a little bit. But we’re over the moon excited for this new chapter in our lives, and the plans God has in store. We couldn’t be more thankful to the big, loving God we serve. We’re so honored He gave us our Mae Day today.
Enjoy some pics…
January 31, 2011 at 11:50 pm
I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel.
Philippians 1:12
Well, the big day is here. For at least six months, I’ve dreamed of what this day would entail. Last year, it was a hard, emotional day. I actually titled my post “My Personal 9/11.” I had so many emotions, and many of them included shock and pain from being diagnosed a second time. But as this day neared, and the reality that I’ve shown cancer who’s boss for 10 years now set in, I have become overwhelmed with joy and excitement for this day.
As I’ve thought about what to share on this annual post, the word that kept rolling through my mind was “redeemed.” Everything can be redeemed.
Everything can be Redeemed
“Redeem” is a churchy-word these days. Except when it comes to coupons. When you “redeem” a coupon, you give the clerk a slick, glossy piece of paper and in return, you get a benefit. Sometimes it’s $1 off, sometimes you get an item free. But once something that seemed worthless (a piece of paper with a bar code) has suddenly been redeemed and gone through the store’s checkout system, all of a sudden it has extreme value.
As I look back over my 10 years on this cancer journey, I have an abundance of joy this year knowing that my cancer is being redeemed – and only through my faith in Jesus Christ. What has seemed just hard and painful, and often worthless to me, has been made glorious and new because it’s been sent through the filter of Jesus Christ and the Gospel.
Opportunities from Cancer
God’s redeeming my cancer – and He’s not done yet. He’s opened up innumerable opportunities for me to share my faith and the Gospel with others. He’s given me an outlet and a way to connect with people who I would have never met otherwise. He’s helped keep others healthy, as I LOVE getting random Facebook messages from people asking me about their poo. He’s given me the experiences of a lifetime – whether it’s marrying my caretaker, modeling for a calendar, getting a tattoo, or even dropping the puck at a hockey game. And the biggest redemption in my book thus far; He used my second diagnosis of cancer to put on us on a path of domestic adoption – a path that’s recently let us to the baby girl we will be adopting within about a week.
10 Year Cancer-versary
God is good, and today, on my 10 year “cancerversary,” I sing his praises louder than I ever have before. As we sang in church this morning, “Oh God, you are my God, and I will ever praise you…” tears streamed down my face. A song of strength, as I’ve sung this to myself over and over to get through some of the hardest days. But also tears of joy, as I will soon be singing this same song to my daughter so that she can know and love God – and sing of his redemption in her life, too.
To all of my friends, family, physicians and support network who’s been with me for over 10 years, today I express my deepest gratitude to you. Thank you for loving me and supporting me on this journey. And while I had dreams to make this day a big celebration, or even put on a big fundraiser for the Colon Club… I felt it was best to keep it simple and point all things back to the Cross. That other stuff can come later.
As the verse I opened with in Philippians says, I count all things that have happened to me (including a young colon cancer diagnosis) as an opportunity to further the Gospel. I plead with you today, if you’re not sure of your faith, to send me a message and let’s talk. My faith in Christ alone has gotten me through my darkest days, and I guarantee that whatever struggle you’re doing through, whatever suffering you have, Christ is just waiting at the door, waiting to redeem your hurts, too. If you know Christ, but you’re struggling right now, don’t give up. Christ has you in His hands, and He will get you through this. He will redeem whatever struggle you have, too.
For I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance, as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death.
Philippians 1:19-20
January 23, 2011 at 5:15 pm
So as you might be able to tell, I’ve just run with this whole “semicolon” thing.
The nice thing for me is that since I’m a blogger and a writer – it works. For those who have no idea who I am, they think I’m obsessed with the semicolon – like my friend Ditty. 🙂
But for those of you who know me, you know exactly where it comes from. Oh – as well as the nice teller at the bank who nicely asked the origin of my (weird!) business name.
So as I was trying to come up with a name for my small business last spring, this was a natural fit. I used “communications” to house all the different types of things I do and felt the “semicolon brand” best personified who I am, and my driving force for try new things – like building up a random freelance business!
I can’t really say anything except that God is good to me, and His plans are way better than mine. What started as a small way to start making a few extra dollars last year has become somewhat of a growing business! I’m finding my business is growing, as well as my client and to-do list! Of course, all of this growth has been on the heels of our adoption – so the extra money certainly has helped our endeavors!
As I really began to get going with Semicolon Communications, God put Midwest GI in my path as my first big client – and then followed a connection with Amy Driver, owner of DA Designing. Partnering with Amy this past year has allowed me to expand my portfolio, become an official “freelance copy writer” and meet some more awesome connections, like Rob from Turn The Page Marketing who’s hired me as his SEO businesses’ copy writer. And this is just the beginning… I’ve got a few more leads that have come in lately, and I have a feeling that this is only the beginning…
So with that said, I have to say that God is good, and I am enjoying his unexpected plan and blessings. And two – I am excited to unveil the official Semicolon Communications website. Here.
What a wild ride it’s been the past year. I can’t wait to see what happens from here…
* A special thanks to DA Designing for this AMAZING site. It’s an honor working with you guys.
January 11, 2011 at 4:04 pm
Dear Dr. T,
Do men fart more than women each day, on average? Or are women just not owning up to it?
(It’s been said that on average, men fart an average of 17 times a day, and women fart an average of 9 times a day.)
Dr. T’s Answer:
Yes, it’s true. I honestly don’t know why. It could be diet, bigger GI tracts, and/or swallowing more air.
So there it is ladies and gents. Men do, on average, pass gas more often than women. That is of course when we’re comparing men and women with normal colons. Now in the case of a semicolon or someone else with some IBS/GI-stuff happening… yeah … it’s a whole different ballgame.
January 9, 2011 at 10:55 pm
When Mike & I headed down this road to adoption, there were many scary unknowns. Cost, health of the child, timing – all of this was scary – but nothing was scarier to me than the impact of my health history on our opportunity to become parents.
After a quick Google search, I was somewhat discouraged. Post after post talked about how cancer survivors cannot adopt children. Countless amounts of negativity ensued online, some of my hopes got down, but thanks to my apparent low-level of trust and asking-a-lot-of-questions personality (can you tell I took a personality assessment yesterday?) we found some loopholes… err, I mean silver lining. (oh, by the way, I’m also apparently an optimist.)
Domestic vs. International Adoption and Cancer Survivors
As much as I would love to be the be-all, end-all resource for information on cancer survivor’s eligibility to adopt, unfortunately this post can only pertain to what I’ve personally gone through or researched. I hope to do an update on this after we actually go through the process and understand more.
But – my story involves understanding that cancer DID have an impact on the type of adoption that we pursued. We begun our journey several years ago looking into international adoption. We had our sights set on a little Ethiopian baby and had begun to weigh the pros and cons of several adoption agencies. At this point, I was cancer-free and had been so for 8 years. I didn’t think I have a problem going this route.
I was soon diagnosed with a second colon cancer – though much, much more minor than the first (only stage 1). However, to those not too familiar with the cancer circuit and how all of that works – cancer is cancer and scary and yikes! As I recovered and looked into adoption again, I realized that our chances to internationally adopt within the upcoming few years were shot, and that even if we waited for a few years, our path to adopt internationally could be negatively affected by my cancer.
Most agencies require that those diagnosed with cancer be 3-5 years cancer-free (depending on the agency.) I will say this is understandable in most cases, as we all want to make sure that the children’s adoptive parents will be as stable as possible. But we also learned that some countries, like China, do not allow anyone who’s had cancer to adopt, and others aren’t too keen on it either. Some countries will allow you to pursue the process after you’re 5 years cancer free, but could get hung up on medical tests and Hague Convention stuff.
As I began to really get down (it’s not like getting diagnosed again was some cake walk for me, either…) I did find some hope. Because we were hoping to adopt sooner than 5 years, we realized that we might have to go a different route.
Cancer Survivors Adopting Domestically
The day that I hung up with Mike from American Adoptions is one that I will never forget. As much as my chemo brain lacks remembering these days – that moment after speaking with Mike is not one of them.
I had spent the afternoon searching agency after agency, browsing through the FAQs section on websites, looking for policies on cancer survivors adopting. After finding closed-door after closed-door on the international front, I remembered that our friend Colleen had a family member who’d used American Adoptions, and raved about working with them. I had filed away Colleen’s email with their information, and quickly searched to find the web address.
When I didn’t see anything on their website about cancer, I called their home office and had the best conversation with one of their family specialists, Mike. He explained that their agency didn’t have a “cancer policy,” and that they would gladly work with me. (Side note – he was a cancer survivor himself, so he TOTALLY knew how I was feeling.) After we hung up the phone, I knew that God had just helped make what could be a very difficult and hard decision so simple. Instead of taking so much time to find an international agency and country, we were guided to look into domestic adoption instead, and work with American Adoptions.
The Home Study Process and my cancer
We didn’t rush into signing up, and I actually let about a year post-surgery go by until we applied with our adoption agency. I wanted to give myself some time to physically and emotionally heal. When we applied with our adoption agency, I was a little over one year cancer-free again.
Part of our home study process involved medical records, and getting a letter from our physicians to say that we both had normal life expectancies. Because I stay up-to-date on my lab work, CT scans, PET scans and more – my physician was more than comfortable to show that I absolutely had a normal life expectancy.
To be double-sure that cancer would cause no problems, my social worker recommended that I also get a detailed letter from my oncologist, explaining my follow-up plan and remission. My doctor wrote a glowing note about my treatment, plan for follow ups, as well as the signs that my cancer was cured. This all was for my file, and will help prove even more that I am healthy, healed, and able to parent regardless of my cancer history.
Can a Cancer Survivor Adopt?
So to answer the question – YES! As I’ve found out, even when it seems like doors are closing left and right, there’s often another path that comes open. We’ve been encouraged to find a domestic agency who didn’t even blink to hear that I was a cancer survivor. We’re excited to be going through this adoption process, and the opportunities ahead of us.
I will also say that I have not hardly touched on the options for cancer survivors to adopt internationally, nor the foster care adoption route. I honestly have not had a lot of experience with this yet. But I leave you with a few links that I have found to be encouraging if you’re in this boat, too, and looking for your possible open door…
This site explains questions to ask yourself as a survivor who wants to adopt, and international adoption options.
Fertile Hope is dedicated to helping cancer survivors begin families
A Yahoo! Discussion group about Adoption after Cancer
January 8, 2011 at 5:02 pm
To all of my faithful blog readers, happy 2011 from our family to yours.
We’re looking forward to a new year….
- a year where we’ll become parents (hopefully!)
- a year that will mark 10 years in this cancer game for me
- a year where we’ll make new friends, and stick with the old
- a year that will bring about many changes for us in every way possible
- a year that we’ll never forget
January 5, 2011 at 11:19 pm
I have to say, while I am very partial to ’09, the 2011 Colondar gave our group some stiff competition.
The 2011 Colondar
Not only do the models have amazing stories, but the design on this bad boy is beautiful. Bright colors, cheerful smiles, and real personalities shine through on the Colon Club’s 2011 Colondar.
I’m especially fond of this group as I’ve had the opportunity to do some press for the Colon Club this year. It’s been awesome to put my PR hat on and try to help gain some exposure for this amazing project. My life wouldn’t be the same without the Colondar and the Colon Club. That’s why we keep working on these crazy projects and spreading the word.
Check it out yourself here.
Also remember- Colondars make great gifts for those in the medical community, cancer survivors, and especially gifts for those recently diagnosed with colon cancer.
Enjoy!
December 26, 2010 at 6:15 pm
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Today, I hope the world is covered in blue.
So as I was trying to come up with a name for my small business last spring, this was a natural fit. I used “communications” to house all the different types of things I do and felt the “semicolon brand” best personified who I am, and my driving force for try new things – like building up a random freelance business!
Dear Dr. T,
Semicolon Stories 